one thousand cups of coffee. the dirt is deep in my eyebrows. have i been foolish? the array of diners, motels and bad directions makes me feel more misplaced within such a vast land, filled with so many people. eating from the buffet table where steam is rising from the fried chicken breasts. people pick at them with tongs. i'm no better. what a large world to wander around alone in. wanting to turn to my right and say something to someone. about nothing, the way one speaks to a loved one, someone very close to talk with, about nothing. whatever comes to mind, spouting random thoughts and observations. not bullshit, it's not bullshit. it's the most warm and loving dialogue. simple and open. to be so close to someone else's mind that your mouth harbors no hesitation. simply saying, and knowing everything is accepted. every word considered in a simple way, a gentle manner. even when they aren't cohesive. cognitivity need not exist between true and trusted friendship. that is to say, it is irrelevant due to deeper understanding. here there are only strangers. delightful strangers coming and going, smiling and giving me coffee. but strangers are like masturbation, as sex is to actual friendship. the brain requires social interaction, and these strangers don't provide complete gratification. but i love to watch them eat.