{ mysteries. }

jacked up on coffee. i was sitting outside having a cigarette. when a group of women past me by, and one of them said softly, "hello miss megan..." i exhaled a mouthful of smoke, looking startled. she was wearing a red wind-breaker, telling me her daughter attends kindergarten at the school where i work. my brain skimmed through a list of the kindergarten/parent faces i could remember. nothing came up. she could tell i didn't know who she was, and asked how my break was going. hiding my cigarette i politely said, "it's been very lazy, and nice." we wished each other a good night. she seemed understanding of my smoking, or at least absent of judgments. it was strange. i thought, "i'm like a kindergarten celebrity..." because i had no idea who this lady was, or who her kid is.

i've become increasingly paranoid about parents or their kids witnessing my bad habits. i can't smoke on the street in north portland anymore. i hide constantly. but in this neighborhood, i feel far enough removed from school grounds to have as many public smoke breaks as i like. in a way, this was a nightmare. in another, she didn't really seem to care. and if anything, was making an effort to put me at ease.
encounters

i've been sitting in the coffee shop for at least five hours, for the past three days. "getting things done". but my computer is so slow, i end up in this crazy coffee computer time warp, where nothing real gets done. only kind of. whatever. it's spring break... whoo. "well, somebody had to say it..." shakey.